Monday, March 7, 2011

The Good, The Bad & The Angry

The Good:
  • We are seeking help and are hopeful that we are headed in the right direction.
  • Emmah has great days at school where she works hard and makes great choices.
  • Our family and friends are a great support asking and checking on us and on our progress, offering hugs, words of encouragement, and offering to help.
  • We have gotten to have some fun family moments lately, even if they are few and far between.
  • Health, overall we are healthy, just seeking some help.

The Bad:

  • Emmah has rough days at school
  • Sometimes at home behavior isn't always what we hope it will be.
  • The time between appointments is going to challenge us, but we must wait.
  • Our family time is sometimes compromised, and plans must change.

The Angry:

  • That we have to deal with this issue at all, even though deep down I know that God wouldn't give us more than we can handle.
  • My mom isn't hear to listen, to help, to advise, and to just lean on. I miss her right now and have realized that I am really ANGRY that she isn't here, that I can't call her up, cry on her shoulder, or ask her advice. Where is she when I need her most??

This last one has been a struggle for me, and was brought to my attention a few weeks has been on my mind a lot lately. Deep down I am really mad that she isn't here, how dare she not be here when I need her. I know we will make it through and we are never given more than we can handle, but I need her and she's not here!!


Katie at A List Maker's Life said...

Oh Kate! I can't even imagine how upsetting it is to not have your mom to talk to while you are going through a difficult time. There is no replacement I'm sure, but know that your friends really do care and want to listen when you need them (us!). As for the line "God doesn't give us more than we can handle..." I believe it. I am sure it is true, but I also know that it is often the VERY last thing you want to hear or say when you just want it to be okay to be angry. And I completely believe that God is okay with us being angry...even angry with Him. If we didn't love Him first we wouldn't have the capacity to be angry and to learn to lean on Him more. Okay...that was a big old comment all to say...I care.

kbloems27 said...

Thanks Katie. It truly is comforting to know that we are surrounded by such great friends and family who do care and will listen.

WendyRB said...

We DO care Kate! Whenever you need a shoulder just call. :)